Sunday, March 11, 2007

Jenna is my myspace Friend!!!!!

Dear Blog!
Ah Mah Gahd!!!
Jenna Bush is my myspace friend!!! I'm about 90% certain it's really her real space!
Dear real-friends-I-know-in-real-life,
I now have a major responsibility to my new myspace friend, Jenna Bush and I may have to ignore you a bit. Sorry in advance if I don't make it to your parties, shows, whatevers, but I very well may be hanging out in Crawford, Texas! Or the White House! I plan on being a very good myspace friend to Jenna, regardless that her dad is into torture. I have dominatrix friends and they also like a little pain now and again, so what's the big whoop? I have to prepared at any moment to go anywhere or do anything for my new myspace friend! She very well may ask me to be a guest-artist at the inner-city school she teaches at! I'll have to drop my voiceover career and head to DC! Hopefully her invite will also include dinner and cocktails with Laura and George! Crossies! I'll bet George makes a mean martini - dirty with extra olives... When I do go to cocktails, I'll definitely ask after Mr. Whittington's health (Dick's hunting partner). I'm worried that George won't remember our cocktail hour, though, because he and Abramhoff apparently enjoyed over ten photo-ops together, and George doesn't remember anything! I'll recommend ginsing to him. In a gentle way, of course. I don't want to call attention to his memory-loss, which is obviously related to aging. I'm going to stay focused on my girlfriendship with Jenna! Here are some questions for our impending girlfriendship:
1. What kind of guys to you like, because I have a lot of single friends?
2. Do you read Harpers?
3. I don't mean Harper's Baazar - I mean Harpers.
4. Do you know anyone serving in Iraq?
4.5 Do you know anyone with a prosthetic limb?
5. Who were you rooting for in the Lynndie England trial?
6. Does the Patriot Act get in the way of your partying?
7. Spit or swallow?
8. Just kidding!
9. Being a social sort of gal, are you a fag hag? Because I am.
10. Do you want to go to the next DragStrip with me? It's an awesome drag show in LA!
PS: I'm making cookies right now, as I blog, and it occured to me as I spatulaed the most recent batch, that perhaps the Secret Service goes through Jenna's Myspace and checks into people's background.... Do you think they'll care that I voted Green Party for San Francisco Mayor?
PPS: I'm having a frito-pie party this saturday, Jenna! Hope you can make it! email for directions!
Love The UkuLady


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